Greetings! Before I commence complaining, I would like to provide an audiobook recording update. I have 99.9 percent of my voice back and have now finished recording 6 chapters!
Now, the…rant? It’s not intense enough to be a rant.
So I’m listening to an audiobook that shall remain nameless. It’s a best seller. There’s a TV show. It’s a big deal.
The writing is somewhat questionable. The word “bigness” has been used multiple times.
The main character is a man. The romantic interest is a lady. We’ll call main character “MC” in the interest of efficiency.
When MC first lays eyes on ladyfriend, the author/MC spends a significant amount of time describing how utterly perfect her physical appearance is. The picture of femininity, super slim arms, delicate bird bones, ballerina-like. Did I mention she’s French? And a genius biologist from a prestigious, European university?
The author goes on to describe how perfect looking she is over and over. We get it. You’ve created an unrealistically hot female in your brain. Congratulations.
Did I mention she was the most boring character of all time? Seriously, the woman has served the following functions in the story: 1. Damsel in distress. 2. Emotional support for MC. 3. Provided a baby for MC.
That’s it.
What happened to her brain? At the beginning of the story, she was supposedly a brilliant biologist. Now, she just follows MC around, fretting and functioning as eye candy and corraling MC Jr.
Super gross.
I’m not quite done with the book, so there is a chance she could still serve some real purpose in the story. However, I’m not overly optimistic.
If you’re a writer, please don’t do this. Seriously. I mean, what is this, the fifties?
Sneaker disapproves of boring characters.
Professional Stringer of Words 